things for you to read: extended edition

First, in totally depressing things that are depressing, there's this article that makes it super obvious why more survivors of rape and sexual assault don't come forward. I strongly urge you to read it and pass it around, especially because of the part where juries in sexual assault cases are generally not open to persons who have been personally affected by sexual assault (which I assume includes close friends or family members of survivors). People need to talk about this! People need to stop victim-blaming! Juries need to convict actual sex offenders instead of putting fifteen-year-olds who had emotionally-but-not-legally-consensual-sex (in many states in the US, the legal age of consent is 16) on registered sex offender lists for life. In that vein, there's also this amazing article from Salon about how the well-meaning advice on how to avoid getting raped is, well, completely stupid and useless. During the entire course of my abusive relationship, I had zero alcohol (I didn't even try sips of my parents' wine at dinner until I was in college), I wore lots of layers in a weird proto-hipster style, I had a curfew, and none of that stopped my abuser from being an abuser. I had nothing to do with what he did.

Okay, angry survivor rant over.

Next on the list: a young Joan Rivers doing stand-up on some sort of bizarre variety show thing.

I don't know if you read the "If I Were a Poor Black Kid" article - I got about halfway through before I quit reading in disgust - but even if you didn't, the responses outlined in this article are an interesting and worthwhile read.

Ryan North jumps on the holiday bandwagon, albeit in a very cynical (and enjoyable) way.

I can't remember if I've linked to ManBoobz before, but it's great for when you need a little ragercise in your day. This old Maxim article, in particular, was a great workout for my anger-glutes.

One of my good friends linked me to The Bloggess, who is hilarious and awesome and whose other blogs I haven't gotten to yet because there is already a lot to read just on this one - anyway, if this story of taxidermy doesn't make you want to read the whole thing, I don't understand you.

Businessweek's awesome correlation =/= causation graphs will hopefully make you laugh, if you are a nerd like me, or if you just appreciate how ridiculous things are sometimes.

I always love MentalFloss, and this Real or Onion? quiz was crazy difficult, and sort of hilarious.

This video will probably make you dizzy.

Whitewashing! Yayyyy (and by "yayyyy" I mean "uuuughhhhhhhhhhhhhhh") !!!

Finally, the best gift for any holiday, that just keeps on giving.

(But actually, if you're looking for a holiday gift for someone who really doesn't need anything, maybe consider sponsoring something in their name for someone who does need something?)